turn over a new leaf

second chances

i reflect back, who i was from 2008- 2011... pls dont judge me anymore. i wasnt a perfect person, i wasnt a saint but neither was i the devil. i have wrongs that ppl dont like, yet they judge me before they judge themselves and believe i was whoever they speak to be. Just because i dont follow what you all believe, that does not mean im a bad person. However, i do admit, i have done wrongs and till now then i realize my wrongs. Till recently ive seen myself and want to turn over a new leaf. i have fears that ate me up inside that it still hurts, but the mistakes that i myself made, made others look stupid as well. Im sorry that my phobia had made you look like a monster :{ cos i really didnt mean it...now i feel nothing but regret...so its wrong for me to have that phobia :{?and to those, whom i have critic against, yes i know i had done wrong, so i changed it, yet you still judge me for who i was in the past. To those who know that im too open, while i apologize and im trying real hard to be more close up cause i know that sometimes being too open and easy go lucky hurts others as well.

 yes its true that i used to prefer a guy's companionship to girls, because i always felt that girls cant tell when the limit is reached, they cant hold their tongue and gossip and backstab but now i feel more afraid of guys whom i have no close ties with more than ever, and i question who to trust now more than ever. i turn more paranoid than ever.

i look at myself, i feel so dirtied and stupid, i had not live the life that God wants me to live and i have not enjoyed the relationship that Abba wants me to have with Him. so i want to start anew, im sorry to those, im leaving behind, i cannot afford to look back anymore. so i want to change for the better.


to love; hiie dearest, im turning more paranoid now adays, so please bare with me alrights:{!!!!btw, i dunnoe where did you go and it's a day already:{! faster come back, imissyou already larh!!!!

{personal blogging done}




{food porn/random posting next}
hiie guys, this is just a post that i want to include, i dont want to leave out my thoughts and feelings about my personal life. after all this is my blog, yes i promised to show you ppl the lomo cam that ive bought. it's already here but i've decided to make a post about it when i have done 1 round of photo taking with it and release everything 1 shot. Yes i know im losing readers and i'm real sorry about that ya:I! im thinking about Vloging soon, and yes i'll be changing blog skin soon as well. 
now then, lets go for a proper blogging shall we:}? so it's 22 November 2011, 2 days ago it's 20 11 2011, this only comes once! what have you guys been doing on that day? i spent it staying at home and lazying around when i'm supposed to be job-hunting! im going for a 'walk-in' interview with yingru tomorrow hopefully or else wise, the day after. Yes, im going try and become a salesgirl! i need the $$$ guys! i owe my uncle a hefty $500 bucks for helping me to get my baby lomo camera! to those who think im a princess who just ask for what i want 

 

anyhows, have you guys eaten at Din Tai Fung 

ive a craving for Din Tai Fung so many times, my mom jiejie(elder sister) and yingru are most likely getting annoyed with me already. im in love with their 小龙包(xiao long bao/pork buns?) its a nice blend of pork minced meat and sauce? inside a tiny bun thats not too tiny not too thick, there's a pleasant bun and a not too meaty taste, hence it became one of my must haves! every now and again. 

 

 

okie i have my own self taken photo of the bao itself and this photo from google is far nicer looking. check it really! (the left pic is theirs, mine's right) and yes, i did not order the chicken ontop the egg fried rice! btw, i love the bao so much that i actually ate 9 of them whilst already having ordered and eating the egg fried rice! okie thats all for now for food porn, i intend to eat like craze during this break i'll be having.

now the next issue i'd like to touch on....

privacy.....

i want to find ways to actually private alot of things now ._. yeap my facebook's public but now im trying to find ways to actually private it down real tightly, im too lazy to 1 shot mass delete friends, im too lazy to create a more private acc, so ive actually private it to the max really. Cause i dont like stalkers who stalk like crazy like as if its their life(not those once in awhile one! those i dont mind) and posers. yes, im paranoid really. ya i have fb but not tweeter cos i dang always forget my tweeter acc;'{ and im too shy to ask ppl to follow me on twitter either. so far the only thing i dont bother having the privacy lack is tumblr/blog cos not many ppl actually read ;x